Rove: |
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Carlos, the President and I are very concerned about the economy. |
Gutierrez: |
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I don't understand, sir. Sales are up, profits are up, Wall Street is passing out record bonuses and ...... |
Cheney: |
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Not everybody is happy, Carlos. |
Rove: |
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We're getting Googled, Mr. Secretary. |
Gutierrez: |
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But just look at Google and the techs. Most are going through the roof. The press is praising the economy. |
Cheney: |
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Goddamn press. |
Rove: |
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We are well aware of the good news, Mr. Secretary. Greenspan is happy. Wall Street is happy. But Main Street is not. |
Bush: |
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Not happy at all Carlos. Right, Karl? |
Gutierrez: |
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I don't understand. Why, Google and the techs are.... |
Rove: |
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They don't pull their weight in employment, Mr. Secretary. |
Cheney: |
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Goddamn Google has a market cap of $122 billion and it employs only 3,021 people. |
Rove: |
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That's only one job per $41 million in investments. |
Gutierrez: |
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That's terrible! We did much better at Kellogg. |
Bush: |
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I always had a soft spot in my heart for Tony the Tiger. |
Rove: |
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Kellogg has a market cap of $18.4 billion and employs 25,000 people. That's one job for every $736,000 in investments. That's 55 times better than Google. |
Cheney: |
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My good old loyal Halliburton even tops Kellogg. Halliburton takes only $315,000 to create a job. And everybody keeps picking on them. |
Bush: |
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Unlike the newspapers, I think Halliburton is doing a great job in Iraq. |
Cheney: |
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Goddamn newspapers. |
Rove: |
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Mr. Secretary, it's important that you encourage those industries that create more jobs for the investment buck. |
Gutierrez: |
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You have any industries in mind, Karl? |
Bush: |
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We made a study, haven't we, Karl? |
Rove: |
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Yes, Mr. President, we have. Advertising has a great ratio of jobs to capital. Interpublic, the advertising and public relations giant, creates one job for every $92,000 in investments. And there are others. Public relations, motion pictures, television, lobbying .... |
Bush: |
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Lobbying is good. Keeps lots of ex-Congressmen in jobs. |
Cheney: |
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Admirals and generals too. |
Gutierrez: |
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I see. You mean service industries. Like the law and ..... |
Rove: |
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Not lawyers, Mr. Secretary. They're loyal to the Democrats. |
Cheney: |
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Goddamn lawyers. |
Bush: |
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But banks are good, aren't they? |
Rove: |
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Pretty good, Mr. President. Citicorp creates one job for every $870,000 in investments. |
Gutierrez: |
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Wal-mart must be sensational at job creation! |
Rove: |
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Yes. Mr. Secretary. Wal-mart takes only $127,000 to create a job. |
Cheney: |
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We don't have a moment to lose. |
Gutierrez: |
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I'll get right on it, Mr. Vice President. |
Rove: |
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Urgency is necessary, Mr. Secretary. We must reverse the President's poll numbers before the Congressional elections. |
Bush: |
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Top speed, Carlos. Right now, nobody wants me to campaign for them. It's really embarrassing. |